Dear Former Human Child, CEO of the GAP,
When you were a child, you probably dreamed of enslaving poor Asian people so they would die tragically in building fires and collapses while doing your bidding? No? If not, then you’ve screwed up. Now that you are a human adult, your former human child is probably ashamed of the person you’ve become.
It may seem out of your power to do anything constructive now without letting someone down, but maybe you should start making yourself proud of your own actions, and the rest of us will start looking out for ourselves instead. We don’t need your adult human kind of help right now.